A little over two years ago I went on a trip that I am still returning from. I had just finished school, was offered a job the day after I graduated, all was good. Everything was going according to plan in my life. Then I got into the plan and realized that though many aspects of it were just right I as a person was not who I thought I was supposed to be in living this life. So everything started changing and I became increasingly unhappy with many things for no reason at all. That led me to one mistake after another as I raced down this curvy strange road. I was going faster and faster and out of control. My first accident was committing to a relationship I thought was going to change me into who the person for this life was supposed to be. Problem with that was that I did not want to be changed, I wanted to forced to be changed. It isn't necessary for me to go into too much detail for it to be evident how this relationship went.
I was still searching and holding on to the idea that if I would only force myself into the caricature I created of what my life should be I would eventually get there. So I fought and fought and simply became more and more frustrated by trying to swim upriver when what I should have done was get to the shore and sit there for a bit.
